The day began as any other in the south of the Great Empire – the morning glowed sickly brown with flecks of purple as the old sun cut through layers of patriotic chemical fog. The re-education camps were already alive with the screams of those regaining their harmonious relationship with the state. Minor officials lay awake, puzzling over the changes in their children returned from study overseas – their once docile offspring now equipped with a thousand excuses for every small task.
Out in the fields the toil was as it ever was, and the plastic vomit factories still busy from the night shift, meeting the endless needs of the decadent west for novelty. At Baiyun airport the official beggars plied their trade in multiple languages, most of them plain clothes officers keeping an eye on the ‘taxi drivers’, who were plain clothes officers keeping an eye on the ‘beggars’.
But on this day came a visitor from above, a message from the stars conveying great dissatisfaction with the order as it was. There were signs for those who could read them – the complete absence of birds was not one as all bird life had died long ago from mercury poisoning – no – the giant advertising banners for MERCEDES BENZ and CHANEL and IPHONE quivered with urgency – the metal detectors clanged and pinged with alarm – the rumble of traffic joined by an even deeper rumble …
A huge meteor from regions ethereal, although marked with an earthly thought, an inscription caught by multiple hidden cameras;
FUCK YOU GUANGZHOU AIRPORT
hurtling across the Great Empire guided by an alien intelligence, purposeful and malignant. It swooped and slipped around the edges of the air patrols and there is evidence of an impossible curve in the final moments – sweeping through terminal A up and through the immigration gates, the holding area for foreigners and doubling back to render the onboard baggage inspection area into a molten slag of metal, uniforms, batons and visa stampers.
The devastation was terrible; but no one hurt (except a kick in the arse for that plain clothes officer that gave me shit.)
Chinese media played down the affront as a small disruption to the ever glorious march of aviation in the one true nation. Ai Weiwei was re-arrested for exceeding his last duty free allowance by 1,000 litres. Plastic vomit production was doubled as part of a five year plan.
The subsequent diversion of all air traffic to Beijing was added to itineraries as an ‘additional technical stop’.
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