Seedlings of science, behold! The UNP Faculty of Recall has great tidings!
We have already provided a number of updates of great interest to the modern student. Their didactic power is now overwhelmed by fortunate events.
While we do not hold the theoretical abilities of our Southern rivals in much esteem, it must be admitted that South Pole University makes good use of their diggings. In the mountains that rise above the Tasman Desert, the ancient city of Hobart looks out over the Derwent Chasm – a charred remnant like most cities but offering up the occasional surprise to the archaeologist. Such a surprise was unveiled some 6 months ago, and the professors of the South have bundled up copies of the artefacts for our Northern minds to dissect and discern.
Three months it takes from pole to pole and expensive it is, given the toxic landscape and the primitives that harass the motorcades. But this is a prize worth the highest price.
For we have an image of a living Santa. And AN ANIMAL.
Behold. The man wears the ceremonial facial hair of the Santa. We see him at a time when he is not garbed in red but in blue – being a Prime Minister; we would venture to say that this image records the very moment when the older Santa has died and this male child has been handed the first of many animals that will fly him around the globe. The animal is content to rest momentarily in the Santa’s hands, it will fly off through the exit at the right.
On the back of the artefact is the word SNOWBALL. We have already a cylinder marked SANTA SNOW. We believe that SANTA, SNOW and BALL are linked, but SNOW remains meaningless.
By what means does this animal fly? The professors of the South were defeated. No two limbs of the device are the same – two seem to be legs fore and aft, then there is a small dark curved arm at the right, perhaps another dark arm at the middle? Dispute rages about a shape below the head of the animal – is it arm? Why is it so short? Our faculty have worked long through the dark part of the year on this question and have decided that the clothing on the pictured animal is loose. It has not been put carefully into the cloth and so some leggings are not aligned with the limbs underneath. This is disappointing in that we cannot be sure of the shape of the animal. We suspect it has two legs and three equally spaced arms.
The head of the animal faces left, close inspection seems to show two eyes about a nose and strangely cupped ears. This is disturbing because insects do not have two eyes, only people. Are animals related to people? The line of thought here is disturbing.
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