The other night my mate Dave treated me to a John Foxx gig. His partner (female) didn’t want to go. So we were out for a night of Underpants!
It wasn’t tiny really, it was that size where the audience calls it intimate and the promoter calls it quits. But they were male, oh god yes and they were very much the presets that you were expecting.
SINE – he is round and phat. He would be Billy Bunter except for that black T shirt with DEATH in crazy lettering – but on him it looks like D E A T H. He is surprisingly nimble and when he dances it’s like a bouncing castle with no kids. On the KVR list he can rip you apart with his rapier wit, in public he’s more like Pluto – no one is sure whether he’s a planet. About 30 percent were SINES.
SAWTOOTH – he’s warm when you first hear him but as the night wears on he starts to become grating. It’s that endless stroking stroking stroking motion. He’s the first to hand out the flattery but pretty soon you will notice a detuned note – it’s like you owe him something now, and like Strangers On A Train it’s all going to get rather Hitchcock before you know it. I KILLED HER I THOUGHT WE WERE BUDDIES. About a quarter were SAWTOOTHS.
SQUARE WAVE – back when he first used to listen to John Foxx all the other kids would beat him up. But now thick rimmed glasses are cool and a job at a design company means he can fill his cubicle with all the Smurfs he ever wanted. Being despised is a lot better than beaten up. And now he’s got Metamatic on CD and tonight it’s going to get autographed and placed in the Glory Box! Lots of these I lost count.
NOISE – it’s not Sisters of Mercy but the closest thing to Goth Night this month, and besides Foxx looks a bit like Dracula so it’ll do it’ll do. These guys dance around trailing their cape around. Swoosh, swoosh – look out you might get your drink spilled by a Child of The Night.
And of course THE BROWN NOTE – he’s the misunderstood genius that SHOULD be the one on stage! I am so much more talented than all you rabble and after I have had 100 more tins of VB I’ll treat you all to my profound wit! Blaaargh! Pfffrt! Damn, shat myself again.
Ok, so what about Mr. Foxx. Well, I didn’t mind the music, and I certainly enjoyed the films but their relationship was rather tenuous. In fact just about everything on screen was met with wash. Buildings = wash. People = wash. This guy is never going to get a gig at Song Zu.
The rock gig bit afterwards was fun enough. He played Underpants.
But two people on stage at the Metro with keyboards and pin lights, with a big video screen behind them. I dunno it feels like it’s been done already 😀